Marriage
Here are the quotes for the Hadiths addressing the importance of marriage with proper references and chains:
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The Hadith on Young Men and Marriage:
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said:
“O young men, whoever among you can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it should fast, for it will be a shield for him.”- Source: Sahih al-Bukhari (Book of Marriage, Hadith 5065), Sahih Muslim (Book of Marriage, Hadith 1400).
- Commentary: This Hadith emphasizes that marriage serves as a protection for chastity and is strongly recommended for those capable of managing its responsibilities.
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The Hadith on Marriage as Sunnah:
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said:
“Marriage is my Sunnah, and whoever does not follow my Sunnah has nothing to do with me.”- Source: Ibn Majah (Hadith 1846), Musnad Ahmad.
- Commentary: This Hadith highlights the importance of marriage as a practice of the Prophet, linking it to adherence to his teachings.
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The Hadith on Completing Half of Religion:
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said:
“When a man marries, he has completed one half of his religion; so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half.”- Source: Al-Bayhaqi in Shu’ab al-Iman (Book of Marriage, Hadith 5376).
- Commentary: Marriage is portrayed as a spiritual and moral safeguard that completes half of one’s religious responsibilities.
Explanation of Chains and Context
These Ahadith come from authentic collections and are often cited to explain the role of marriage in Islamic life. They reinforce the following themes:
- Encouragement for Marriage: It fulfills both spiritual and worldly needs.
- Guarding Chastity: Marriage is presented as a shield against sinful desires.
- Following Sunnah: Aligning oneself with the prophetic tradition by getting married.
The question of whether it is sinful not to get married in Islam depends on individual circumstances. The ruling varies based on one’s situation and intention, and Islamic jurisprudence provides nuanced perspectives.
1. Default Ruling on Marriage
Marriage in Islam is considered mubah (permissible) by default, but it can take different rulings depending on circumstances:
- Wajib (Obligatory): If a person fears falling into sin (e.g., fornication) due to an inability to control their desires, marriage becomes obligatory if they have the means to marry.
- Mustahabb (Recommended): For those who can manage marriage responsibilities and do not fear falling into sin, marriage is highly encouraged as it is a Sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him).
- Makruh (Disliked): For those who cannot fulfill the responsibilities of marriage, such as providing for a spouse, marriage may be discouraged temporarily.
- Haram (Prohibited): If a person knows they will harm their spouse or cannot fulfill their marital obligations, marriage may be impermissible.
2. Evidence from Quran and Sunnah
Marriage As a Sunnah:
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
“Marriage is my Sunnah, and whoever does not follow my Sunnah has nothing to do with me.”
(Source: Ibn Majah 1846)
This Hadith strongly encourages marriage but does not make it obligatory for everyone.
When Not Marrying is a Sin:
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The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
“O young men, whoever among you can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it should fast, for it will be a shield for him.”
(Source: Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 5065; Sahih Muslim, Hadith 1400)This implies that refraining from marriage when one fears falling into sin can lead to sinful behavior, making it obligatory to marry.
3. Scholarly Consensus
Scholars agree that marriage is a means, not an end. It becomes sinful to neglect marriage only if:
- One has overwhelming desires that lead to sinful actions (e.g., fornication).
- One abandons marriage out of disdain for the Sunnah or worldly indulgence.
For example, Imam Al-Ghazali mentioned in Ihya Ulum al-Din that neglecting marriage out of laziness or a desire to avoid responsibility, without any valid reason, could lead to blameworthy behavior.
4. Exceptions
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Celibacy for Worship: While Islam does not promote celibacy as a way of life, there are exceptions where individuals devote themselves entirely to worship or scholarly pursuits, provided they are free from sin. For instance, the Prophet (peace be upon him) did not force marriage on those like Abdullah ibn Mas’ud, who remained unmarried for legitimate reasons.
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No Sin for Lack of Means: If a person cannot marry due to financial constraints or other valid reasons, there is no sin in delaying marriage.
Conclusion
It is not inherently sinful to remain unmarried. However, choosing not to marry can become sinful if it leads to neglecting Islamic obligations (e.g., chastity) or rejecting the Sunnah of marriage with disdain. Each case is judged individually based on intention and circumstances.
Marriage in Islam is a sacred bond grounded in trust, compassion, and mutual respect. Four critical points a husband should avoid sharing to preserve marital harmony:
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Private Conversations with Others
Revealing friends’ or family’s confidences can sow mistrust and create emotional strain. Islam upholds privacy (amanah) as a divine trust that must not be broken. Husbands must balance honesty with discretion, ensuring they do not betray others’ secrets or burden their wife with information that could cause stress. -
Comparing Her with Other Women
Drawing parallels to someone else—regarding appearance, abilities, or behavior—undercuts a wife’s self-worth. Instead, Islam encourages praising a spouse’s unique qualities and contributions, preventing unnecessary insecurities and resentment. -
Past Sins or Mistakes
Although honesty is vital, Islam teaches that sins Allah has concealed should remain private. Disclosing old transgressions can create doubt, emotional pain, or mistrust. A husband should focus on repentance and building a healthier future together rather than reopening past wounds. -
Unnecessary Financial Worries
While financial transparency is key, overwhelming one’s spouse with every monetary concern can generate anxiety. Husbands are urged to provide stability and reassurance. Challenges can be met with faith and prudent planning rather than constant alarm, preserving emotional security in the home.
Effective marriages thrive on open dialogue where needed, forgiveness of human errors, gratitude for one another’s efforts, and a shared spiritual practice—praying together, reciting the Quran, and maintaining privacy around intimate matters.
Iddah Period
The iddah period is a waiting period in Islam for Muslim women who are widowed or divorced. It is a time to mourn, reflect, and heal. During this time, women are not permitted to remarry.
How long is the iddah period?
- Widows: The iddah period for widows is four months and ten days.
- Divorcees: The iddah period for divorcees is three monthly periods for menstruating women, or three lunar months for nonmenstruating women.
What are the rules during the iddah period?
- The woman should not marry another man.
- She should not leave her home unless it is an emergency.
- She should not wear makeup or clothing to attract attention.
- She should spend her nights in her husband’s home.
Why is the iddah period important?
- It removes any ambiguity about paternity if the couple separated or the husband died shortly before pregnancy.
- It gives women time to grieve and reflect.
- It provides an opportunity for divorced couples to reestablish their marriage.