Being Mode and Having Mode

The distinction between the Being mode and the Having mode originates from the existential and humanistic psychology of Erich Fromm in his work To Have or To Be?. This framework explores two fundamental orientations in human life and provides a critical lens to analyze contemporary issues of materialism, relationships, and spiritual fulfillment. Let’s examine these modes, compare them, and explore how Islamic perspectives align with or critique these ideas.

Definition:

• The Being mode focuses on existence, authenticity, and the experience of life. It emphasizes the process of living, growing, and becoming rather than acquiring or possessing.
• It is relational, emphasizing personal growth, creativity, love, and unity with oneself, others, and the environment.

Characteristics:

• Authenticity: People in the Being mode value self-realization and inner fulfillment.
• Experiential: Emphasis is placed on the quality of experiences rather than the accumulation of objects.
• Transcendence: Being mode often involves connecting with higher purposes, such as spirituality or altruism.

Examples:

• Loving someone for who they are, not for what they provide.
• Enjoying a walk in nature for its beauty and serenity, rather than using it as a backdrop for status.

Definition:

• The Having mode is centered on possession, control, and material accumulation. It sees fulfillment in owning objects, titles, or relationships as commodities.
• It reflects a focus on consumption and external validation rather than intrinsic values.

Characteristics:

• Materialism: Happiness is tied to possessions or external achievements.
• Insecurity: Reliance on possessions fosters fear of loss and dissatisfaction.
• Domination: Relationships in the Having mode often involve control rather than mutual respect.

Examples:

• Defining self-worth by wealth or social status.
• Seeking relationships to fulfill selfish needs rather than for genuine connection.

Islam offers a nuanced approach that both critiques the Having mode and enriches the Being mode, rooted in a divine framework. Let us explore:

Critique Of the Having Mode:

• Materialism as a Distraction: The Qur’an warns against the excessive pursuit of material wealth and possessions:

  “The mutual rivalry for piling up (the good things of this world) diverts you (from the more serious things), until you visit the graves” Qur’an 102:1-2.

• Possessions as a Test: Wealth and material goods are seen as tests of character and responsibility:

  “Know that your wealth and your children are but a trial and that Allah has with Him a great reward” Qur’an 8:28.

Support For the Being Mode:

• Focus on Inner Growth: Islam emphasizes self-purification (tazkiyah) and the development of virtues such as patience (sabr), gratitude (shukr), and humility.

• Spiritual Fulfillment: True fulfillment lies in connecting with Allah, as stated in the Qur’an:

  “Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest” Qur’an 13:28.

• Relationships Based on Love and Mercy: Islamic teachings encourage relationships founded on mutual care and spiritual growth:

  “And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy” Qur’an 30:21.

A Balanced Perspective:

Islam does not entirely reject material possessions but integrates them within the framework of ethical and spiritual responsibility:

1. Zakat (Charity): Wealth is a trust, and its surplus must be shared with those in need.

2. Halal Sustenance: Acquiring wealth through lawful means is encouraged but subordinated to the remembrance of Allah.

3. Avoiding Excess: Moderation (wasatiyyah) in consumption and lifestyle is a key principle:

   “And do not spend wastefully. Indeed, the wasteful are brothers of the devils” Qur’an 17:26-27.

Islam acknowledges the necessity of material possessions but integrates them into a higher purpose:

• Wealth as a Means, Not an End: Wealth is to be used to support oneself, family, and community while seeking the pleasure of Allah.
• Tawhidic Framework: The Being mode in Islam is ultimately a submission to Allah (‘ubudiyyah), aligning personal growth with divine will. The Having mode becomes meaningful when used in service to Allah’s commands.

• Convergence: Both Islam and Fromm critique materialism and emphasize inner fulfillment, love, and self-realization.
• Divergence: Fromm’s framework is secular and humanistic, whereas Islam grounds the Being mode in submission to Allah, incorporating both spiritual and ethical dimensions.